It all started on New Year's Eve. Due to a series of unfortunate events, I chipped my front tooth. "No big deal," thought I. "I'll just go to the dentist and get it fixed. So that's what I did. Monday the 7th of January I got my tooth fixed, good as new.
Cut to Wednesday, January 9th. I'm in Kenzy's classroom taking some stuff off of her walls and I feel it. My tooth breaks AGAIN. No big deal. I'll just get it fixed again.
About an hour later I head home. I walk up to the front door to go inside and it's locked. As I'm walking back to the garage to go through the garage door, an icicle hanging from my roof breaks loose and nails me directly in the head. I was literally under the thing for half a second as I walked to the garage door opener. Just my luck.
Bad things happen in threes, right? Right. So I'm waiting on pins and needles for this third thing to happen. I'm convinced that my death is looming closer. It doesn't happen, it doesn't happen, I let my guard down.
So tonight, January 10th, I go to get in the bath, as per my New Year Resolution suggests. I have my book in my left hand at chest level, with my phone balanced on top of it. I step into the bath and trip a tiny bit, just enough to throw my balance off. My weight shifts, my phone slides across the cover of my book, and I quickly shift to keep my phone from plummeting to its watery, porcelain grave below. Long story somewhat short: I saved my phone from falling into the tub, but paper cut my chest in an incredibly painful place. Third bad thing complete.
Worst. New Year's Resolution. Ever.
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